"Maybe if I performed some sort of vivisection, I could get some comedy out of them."

A rubber duck terrorizes an unidentified part of Asia. Unidentified.
This is pretty hardcore. (Not advocating, just saying.)
My game is weak.
A summary of one of the greatest cross-media events of the modern era.
This woman is unreal. (Seriously, this is a digital creation.)
Dear world, you got served.
When I get made into a video game, I want this to be the soundtrack.

Enjoy.

"You go into our museums, it's all stolen. Our museums are basically an active crime scene."

Consider your heart strings a-pulled.
Click the button on the right. Click the basket in the middle. Hold on to your $#!^.
Shakespeare's lesser known "A Slurry Tale"
Another "welcome to earth" post.
Using "pedi-" instead of "pedo-" doesn't make your ideas less creepy.
Stay classy!
Why the last two items happened.

Enjoy.

"Is a beautiful gabber rotterdam's kaalkopje Dutchie on xtc or lsd or the short skoirts next door?"

Somehow this became a music-themed post. We'll be back to the regular shenanigans shortly.

This is psychotic, and might cause seizures.
This is trippy and may lead to hallucinations.
My note says, "this is basically the same, but with synths." Same as what?
This is how aborigines will eventually communicate the loss of their culture.
I'm impressed and in love.
I don't know. Don't ask.

Enjoy.

“Well, you won’t ever be able to have sex again. But you do get to wear this jeweled cape….”

Say "no" to PCP.
And mellow right back out.
You should see how stop-animated the wedding will be.
This is the almighty's house and he won't let you forget it.
Safe for German TV, but NSFW.

Enjoy.

"Tell your sister I'm no fool. Or at least romanticize the notion of the fool."

Now I think they're just screwing with us.
What's the opposite of a nerd boner?
This guy is on his way to becoming Inspector Gadget.
I don't know how this stayed off my radar for so long.
Mad skills, cat.
The best part is the last 30 seconds. (~NSFW)
From Obama to a cow, that's range.
Because you need more evidence of how cool Cincinnati is (or you like professional journalism)
Some behind-the-scenes footage, because crime fighting isn't all glamour.
With the rise of High Noon Tortoise, things might get interesting. Might.

Enjoy.